I’m pretty sure I’m now actually fed up

Dear US Gov’t, House of Representatives, Senate, and related parties:

You know what? Fuck you, that’s what.

Your plan to stimulate the economy doesn’t amount of a fucking hill of beans. It’s a goddamned limpdick hand-job from a burned-out whore.

I mean, what more does this amount to than beer-and-cigarettes money? You know what’s going to go up? Lottery ticket spending, you stupid dickheads.

$1200 is half my fucking mortgage payment. Christ, I think it might not have even been my rent on my 1-bedroom apartment (that I shared with my wife; had I been single, I know the $600 wouldn’t amount to shit).

So if I’m about to get foreclosed, or about to have my car repoed, or $35,000 in credit card debt, what the fuck is that $1200 supposed to be for? New big-screen TV?

Problem the first is, you assholes have never been SMB - Seriously Muthafuckin Broke. Cause if you had been, you’d know: when one is SMB, one no longer gives a fuck about “economic stimulus”. $600 means, “I get a couple extra cartons of Basics and eat the non-generic Hot Pockets”.

In other words there is a kind of “failure point” where things become utterly binary: either you have the money or you don’t. There is no “payment plan” and there is no “economic stimulus”. SMB means “who gives a fuck”, maybe I will blow it all on lottery tickets, Marlboros, and beer.

Problem the second is, you assholes can’t afford politically to do anything meaningful and we know it. If I’m approaching SMB or generally just looking to make my financial situation strong, I very simply

1. Write down my total income
2. Write down all the things I spend money on (expenses)

Then if #2 is greater than #1, I start crossing shit off #2 (ie, reducing spending) until #1 is greater than #2. If I can’t make the totals work out I get another job.

But you assholes can’t do any of that, and you won’t do any of that. You won’t be fiscally responsible, ever. You’re children with their first credit card, uncaring what a minimum payment really means. You won’t just get the fuck out of the war (and use all that WOW FREE MONEY to, oh, pay down debt), you won’t stop ruthlessly piling pork and waste into spending bills, you won’t stop ensuring everyone everywhere gets some cut of the tax revenue no matter what.

The only answer you have to the fiscal clusterfuck you created is further fiscal irresponsibility. You’re like a person who’s $20,000 but frantically applying for credit cards, hoping they can get enough to keep shuffling that debt around. Throw enough money around the club until everyone forgets what an unbearable asshole you are.

Honestly I don’t even want the money (ok that’s a lie I LOVE FILTHY LUCRE, but bear with me). I feel like I’m rewarding bad behavior. Somehow this is supposed to stimulate the economy: I guess a new TV helps? Given that it’s built with Chinese labor by a Japanese company? But Wal-Mart will get their slice so I guess that’s OK.